Lamprey Systems 

Blasphemous Mac Games of Robert Carr

I remember Private Idaho BBS from my pre-internet daze. I couldn't find them on the early WWW but the other day I ran across Lamprey Systems website and was reminded why I once wished I had a Mac. On their No-Frills Leech-O-Rama page you can freely download "Yesterday's Software...Today...At Tomorrow's Prices".

There's Mormonoids From The Deep: Armed only with a Colt .45, a suitcase nuke, one sixpack, and a car that's out of gas. You must destroy the evil YogSogSmith and rescue Unwholesome Olson without being killed, converted, or sobering up. The townsfolk include the Angel Moroni, the Holy Ghost, little Molly Mormon, and Kinky Marie (Marie Osmond's psychotic twin sister).

And there's MacSpudd!: You drive your Armored Potato Transport Vehicle across a post-apocalyptic Idaho populated by mutant jackalopes, Aryan Yuppies, Free-fire Zone Hunters, and cattle mutilating space aliens. Remain cheerful, lest a bad attitude cause your IntraCranial Detonator to implode.

There's more, with titles like: Gerald-O-Matic, MacWanker, Pretty Good Pornography 3.0, Rupture The Rapture, Shock Da Monkey, Straight To Hell (with the Cursor of Torture!), and maybe the most despised Macintosh program ever written MacJesus ProGold, Your Personal Savior on a Floppy Disk. In the words of Robert Carr, "This software wasn't released - it ESCAPED!"

Unfortunately he's back-burnered Sim Despot. As president for life you construct red-light districts and drug routes while funneling money overseas. You must keep your Sims strong enough to produce money but weak enough that they can't revolt.

I wish I had a Mac...

Lamprey Systems